What girl hasn’t dreamt of being a princess? Well, maybe not Cara Maria, but pretty much everyone else. It’s understandable why it would be appealing: getting to wear pretty dresses, having a lot of sparkly crap, spending all day petting cute animals, eating cupcakes for breakfast, and so on (kind of makes up for the whole “forced marriage thing”, but I digress). In celebration, I’ve decided to make a list of my favorite fictional princesses.
1. Princess Peach
She may wear pink, but Peach is not a stereotypical princess. Although she has mostly been the damsel in distress, she’s done her fair bit of saving as well. Her peachiness does not take away from her bad-assery. She is not afraid to race cars, kill Goombas, and kick general Bowser ass. Also, in SMB2, she could float. Awesome.
Imagine this: you’re sitting at home, learning witchcraft, minding your own business, when all of a sudden, this total dreamboat shows up at your door. He’s adventurous, handsome, and sweeps you off your feet. He says he needs help getting this weird golden fleece, and promises to marry you if you help him. So you essentially do the work for him, he takes all the credit, and then leaves you for some stupid wench in Corinth. Do you sit back and take it? No. You send that bitch a poisoned wedding dress.
3. Sleeping Beauty
I love taking naps. I can’t imagine how awesome a 100 year nap would be, especially if it ended with a total beefcake making out with you and a dance session in the sky. Also, she’s got the best outfits out of the Disney Princesses.
4. Ozma of Oz
Ozma is one of the most interesting princesses in modern literature. Given to a witch as a baby by her dictator father, she lived the first thirteen years of her life as “Tip”, a young boy (how she couldn’t figure out she was a girl on her own, I have no idea). After being transformed back into a girl by Glinda the Good Witch, she was installed as Oz’s queen, where she rules to this day, albeit, with a little bit of gender confusion.
5. Arwen Evenstar
Half-human and half-elf, Arwen is one of the heroines in J.R.R. Tolkien’s “Lord of the Rings” trilogy, where she acts as a helping figure to Frodo and the rest of the Fellowship. She also gives up her immortality in order to marry her boyfriend, which is kind of sweet, if you think about it.