How could you not love a hot undead zombie stripper giving you the lap dance of your life followed by eating your face off? Being eaten alive by a rediculously hot undead stripper zombie should be on a “Top 10 Most Awesome Ways To Die” list…. or Top 10 Things to Do Before You Die (literally)…..Maxim, get on that!
Let me introduce you to Jenna Jameson’s cult hit “Zombie Strippers” (2006). This is your perfect Halloween party flick. The movie starts out with a research experiment gone wrong. The government is at a loss of soldiers so they come up with a virus to reactivate the brains of the soldiers we’ve already lost. The experiment backfires. One soldier finds his way to an underground strip club where he bites one of the dancers. The dancers spread the virus to each other and gruesomely hot mayhem ensues.
I highly recommend this movie. There’s humor, horror, and topless dancing zombie girls. What more do you really need?
This article is my excuse to post hot pics of zombie chicks for my own personal enjoyment.
Give me my moment. Also, don’t forget to stock up on all your zombie goods at Frightcatalog.com
Beauty pageants. A couple of things come to mind here.
1. 8 year olds made up to look like Dolly Parton by overzealous pageant moms living vicariously through their children.
2. Rediculously airbrushed tan women starving themselves for weeks to strut a stage in clear heels and a bikini to win more than a few dollar bills, but a crown and some flowers too.
Blah. Blah. Blah. Been there, done that (actually, yes. your very own Halloween Harlot has competed in a few pageants… complete with clear heels and a sequins dress and a huge fake smile to boot… Don’t ask.)
Now a few piercings and skull beads later… I wonder what is out there to cater to awesome girls like me. In my random internet search for pics of hot half dead chicks, I discovered one *hell* of a beauty pageant.
In the fantastical world of the UK, comes the Miss Zombie Queen 2010 Pageant. After watching the video (more than once… mmmm) I can only conclude that instead of the needless evening gown and interview sessions which are the staple of most pageants, this one cuts straight to the chase. Talent competition: roll around in blood and shake your pasties. I dig it. I mean… I wouldn’t run away if these hot zombies wanted to eat me….
Substitute the big hair and spray tans for white contacts and pale dead skin and you got yourself a Zombie Queen!
May I suggest that this contest happens in in my area in the near future? Someone needs to bring this undead sex fetish over my way ASAP. In the meantime, you can gear up for when the madness eventually arises by stocking up on all things zombie at Frightcatalog.
I’m going to go ahead and watch that video again… in slow motion.
Oh- and no disclaimers on this one. Undead blood covered chicks in pasties are hot. I really don’t care what you think. Speaking of *blood covered*, you should probably make sure you have some of that red stuff hanging around your house somewhere. It can come in handy in so many ways. Shove some up your nose to get out of work early or toss some in a plastic tub and have chicks in bikinis wrestle in it… I mean the possibilities are endless.
Resident Evil Afterlife takes place in a world of the undead, plagued by the Umbrella Corp’s manufactured T-virus. Alice (Milla) is back on track collecting survivors and trying to bring people to a safe location…kicking zombie ass along the way. She is joined and aided by some familiar faces. Claire Redfield (Ali Larter) and K-Mart (Spencer Locke).
For some reason the search for safety takes them to Los Angeles. LA was never safe even when people weren’t walking around as blood thirsty zombies…. so I’m not quite sure what they were thinking but hey, it’s a movie. Nonetheless the group is LA bound. They may be heading into a trap before you can say “Zombie Snack!”.
As far as the cast of characters growing, Milla Jovovich is like Batman. She is willing and more then capable of working alone. However, the more movies come out, the more Robin’s and Batgirls seem to be added. Eventually, the Resident Evil franchise may go back to their roots where Milla kicked ass all on her own without the help of sidekicks. In the meantime, I’ll just enjoy the 3D zombie killing action.
Look out for this movie coming out to a theater near you September 10th.