Tag Archives: pauly d

We have a Situation: Jersey Gore.

Pauly D, The Situation, JWOWW, and Snooki.

Unfortunately, we live in a society where these have become familiar names in household and internet discussions.

I’ve come up with something better. This is the possible future of the cast if they continue their guido ways…

Let me introduce you to the new and improved fist pumping cast of the Frightcatalog reality blog: Jersey Gore.

The Situation

Frankenstein Mask

When The Situation talks, people can’t help but stare. He walks around making strange choppy hand and arm movements and coupled with random facial spasms. Frankenstein is sort of a given in this particular “situation”.

JWOWW

Plastic Young Female Translucent Mask

JWOWW… This wasn’t hard. With all the plastic parts on this broad, we figure she can’t really age…

DJ Pauly D

Devil Skull Mask

DJ Pauly D. Two words: Blow. Out. Continuous hair gel applications will do a number on your scalp. Additionally, all those tanning bed visits may leave his skin a bit parched. Make sure you moisturize Pauly!

Snooki

Bearded Lady Mask

Finally: Snooki. She’d really like to have you think her nationality is Italian. However, any true Italian knows what beautiful young Italian girls turn into when they get older. Snook, if you want to play the part… do your research!

Finally, Don’t forget your orange glow. It creates that perfect radioactive orange tan look that keeps the rest of society envious. It could possibly help you land a hit TV show as well.

- Sincerely,

Your Halloween Harlot.