10 Days of Torture: Your Mother in Law.

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Torture comes in all shapes and sizes. So does your mother in law.

So, you’ve met the woman of your dreams. Now comes time to meet the family. You already know your partner was adopted, but you don’t know much about her family. She never really talked about them and you never really asked. All you know is that they raised one hell of a beautiful and perfect woman, so how bad could they really be?

You dress in your Sunday best, pick up a fresh apple pie to bring over, and hit the road.

Your partner is unusually quiet. You take the opportunity to enjoy the silence. After several windy roads, you start to wonder where these people actually live. You look over at your lady. She is compulsively picking at the skin around her nails and licking her lips. You haven’t seen her act this way before. You assume she is just nervous if her family will like you or not. “How much further, honey?”. Your voice breaks the silence and seems to startle her, which in turn startles you too. She looks at you with her wide ocean blue eyes and says “We’re not too far now”. Her quiet and meek voice floats through your ears like a delicate breeze. You really are a lucky man, you think to yourself as you turn focus back on the road.

The daylight is fading fast. However, several trees and windy roads later, you come upon the house. It is a little middle America looking, with a broken down chicken coup in the font and various lawn tools strewn about. Maybe this was why she seemed nervous. You aren’t the neatest and cleanest man around, but this place makes yours look like Martha Stuarts summer home. As you slow down to park, your car shakes and bumps along the uneven dirt road. This is like something right out of the movies. Wanting to ease your lady’s nerves, you take her tiny pale hand and lean over to kiss her pink cheek. “We’re here baby. This is very quaint. Like one of those old country movies…” She seems to know you are just trying to make her feel better, but she lets her small bow lips curl up into a half smile as if to let you know she appreciates the gesture. Her smile quickly disappears as you open the car door.

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After taking a moment to breathe the crisp air into your lungs, you walk to the other side of the car where your lovely lady waits. Her strawberry blond hair seems to warm the dark around you. She looks beautiful with her pretty light blue dress and the apple pie resting in a box on her lap. You smile at her and reach down to open the door. As you look down, you notice a little bit of red on your hands. You gasp when you realize that it’s blood. When it registers that it is not your blood, you quickly realize that it is your lady’s. She must have inadvertently made herself bleed while she picked at her hands in the car. Not missing a beat, you wipe your hands on your jeans and open the door. You don’t want to upset or embarrass her. You softly take her cold hands into your warm ones and help her out of the car without a word.

As you both stare at the sorry excuse for a house in front of you, you squeeze her hand and smile. “Is there anything I should know before we go in there….?” you say with a wink.

….to be continued.

Your Halloween Harlot- Miss Cara Maria

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